Reflections on the Way to Work

Vocabulary.com defines Ode as a kind of poem, usually praising something. … An ode is a form of lyric poetry — expressing emotion — and it’s usually addressed to someone or something, or it represents the poet’s musings on that person or thing, as Keats’ ode tells us what he thought as he looked at the Grecian urn.  While I lack poetic skill, this reflection is dedicated to the many personal trainers I have had and will have in the future.

Since my very first job downtown I have belonged to a gym of some sort.  Over the years there has been a transformation of “gyms” or  “health clubs” or whatever the trendy characterization is used to define them.  Every “gym” or “health club” has its own personality and culture, a topic worthy a separate blog reflection as this one is dedicated to personal trainers!

Three years ago in search of a new gym I finally found a “gym” that had the “personality” and “culture” I was looking for  with the convenience of being close to work so I would have no excuses for being delinquent in my training.   I have been very fortunate throughout my years of training to have worked out with individuals who are skilled trainers that have interesting personalities, diverse backgrounds and interests, and are genuine, nice and fun to speak with.   A trainer has to deal with each client according to the client’s own personality. Some people are serious, others lazy and needing motivation and others, like me, chatty, energetic, and clueless on the anatomy of the muscle structure and forgetful on technique.    I like working out with former college athletes, in particular football players because they bring their techniques of all the years of their training from their respective sports into the workout for their clients while customizing the workout for each client’s skill set. When I see football players working out now I have a greater appreciation for the dexterity they exhibit during their practices. They make hopping through the ladder look so easy!

On my first day at my new gym I met Marcus.  Coincidently, it was Marcus’ first day as a new employee and full time trainer.  As with most trainers I have worked out with, I am old enough to be their mother and in some cases their mothers were probably younger than me!  Marcus played football at Colgate (and yes in case you are wondering, in keeping with the Colgate student body tradition he still brushes his teeth with Colgate toothpaste).  As a trainer Marcus was very focused on having the proper technique to strength training.  As good trainers do, he had a circuit and changed the workout to work different muscles and switch up the monotony of the workout.

Over the 312 hours of training that Marcus and I did we forged a friendship, sharing our daily trials and tribulations called life.  For all that is said about generational divides between millenials and baby boomers, Marcus and I seemed to be able to transcend those stereotypes.  Sometimes I feel like a surrogate mother – worrying about his comings and goings and being local if he was ever in need of something, emotional or otherwise.  We learned from each other and about each other, we imparted wisdom to each other and grew as individuals through our friendship.  It is probably the personal bond that is established that truly kept me motivated to continue to wake up at 4am to make my training sessions.

And then one day,  the unspeakable happened, Marcus decided to move West to Los Angeles.   While it through me into a tailwind, it was not something I was unfamiliar with.  Dennis, one of my former trainers moved to San Diego, and Paul, back to Boston.  There is a special bond that is established with a trainer and as with every type of separation and change, the bond and friendship remains but it is never quite the same.  

Trainers tend to be one of two types, a career trainer or a recent college graduate that is training to support their true passion, in Marcus’ case his desire to be a DJ, or Dennis, an electrician and singer, or the “singing electrician,” or Paul, an acupuncturist. Each one of them moved on to pursue their dreams.  There is always a part of me that says “How could you leave me and New York?   For trainers that are recent college graduates it gives them the opportunity to live some place new, experience big city living and pursue other passions that don’t financially support their lives.  While I am always sad and disappointed that they are moving on I am also happy and proud  of and for them.  I  have so much respect for each of them, for taking risks, and pursuing their dreams, embracing change, not knowing if they will succeed or fail.  They are young enough to start over again and continually transform their professional lives. For all the negative articles and comments you read about millenials , I would like to say from my experience if Paul, Dennis and Marcus are representative of millenials then they defy the negative stereotypes that so many hold of millenials.  Not unlike others from earlier generations, they are just trying to realize their dreams and potential.   Each is happy, successful and working on their dream.  

For me it is a tremendous loss.  However, I realize as the lyrics go, “To everything (turn, turn, turn); There is a season (turn, turn, turn); And a time to every purpose, under heaven.”  There was a time for my friendship and now it is a new season for me to embrace my own change.  I joined a new gym and will try to train alone, equipped with all the skill imparted to me.  However,it’s been a month since Marcus moved West and I have been to the gym only three times……..maybe its time to call Tony, Andrew or Lauren, other great trainers.

In the meantime I stay connected via social media and through more traditional means of communications with my friends and former trainers, each who have taught me that change is good for all of us as it helps us to grow as individuals.    And now, time to go and figure out my workout for the week……….